It’s funny how things change. I’ll be 30 tomorrow, and I can’t help thinking about myself at 20 and how different my priorities were.
When I was 20, I was doing my undergrad in New York City. I went to NYC specifically because it was a huge, metropolitan city far away from Western North Carolina and little old Hendersonville. I thought that if I ever left NYC it would be for another large, metropolitan city that didn’t require a car (I hated driving). I knew that I would never, under any circumstances, move back to North Carolina.
My career would be something incredibly cool and interesting. Practicing law crossed my mind at a few points, but was quickly replaced by becoming an editor at a major publishing house, working in some unknown position in the fashion industry, etc.
My preferred magazines were Glamour, Cosmo, and People. My highest priorities were being thin, being popular, and getting drunk (not necessarily in that order). Looking back, I can tell you that I failed on one of those and I don’t know if what happened with the other two could be classified as success. College was in there somewhere too, but it wasn’t exactly at the top of my list.
My vision of my ideal guy was a cool, intelligent, urbane, bad boy who eschewed anything mainstream. He certainly would have some cool yet intellectual job that paid well. And he definitely wasn’t blond.
Fast-forward to today. I live in Brevard, NC, with aspirations to move to such hip and urban locations as… anywhere where we can get some land. Yes, acreage where we can have a nice little goat farm is now my priority over location. In fact, staying close to family is something of a priority too, though, for the right job, we would certainly consider relocating…to somewhere we could still get acreage and have a little goat farm.
I’m a licensed attorney in North Carolina. Is practicing law cool and interesting? Depends on who you ask. Is my career my identity? No. I enjoy law, but I have a lot of interests outside of it as well.
I currently subscribe to Dairy Goat Journal, Better Homes and Gardens, and Southern Living (thanks, Mom!). My highest priorities are buying a house with some land, succeeding in my chosen career, and managing my little herd of dairy goats. Starting a family in the next few years is in there too, but making the commitment to make and care for a new person is huge and requires some amount of financial stability.
I’m married to an intelligent guy…who’s dorky (just like me); blond; doesn’t care whether or not something is mainstream, just whether he likes it; and is the nicest, most caring man I have ever met. He’s going to school for auto body repair, because that’s what he likes doing. At 20, I probably wouldn’t have responded to his message on that online dating site, but at 26, I did. And it was the best message I ever sent.
Was I wrong at 20? Am I right now? No to both. Life is a journey. We change and mature along the way. Our priorities may change, our goals may change, and our circumstances may change. Change is good. The test is how we react to it. I love where I am now in so many ways. Would I like to change some things? Of course. I would love to hand myself a great job with benefits, some land with a nice house, and financial security. Since I can’t do that, I’ll just have to continue loving the other parts of my life. I have an amazing husband, some very cool animals, and a future full of possibilities.