I promised to write a longer post with all of the details today. It was a very bumpy ride, but in the end our wedding was amazing. This is a long post, so feel free to just look at the photos – I sum up the wedding fails and wedding wins at the end.
The night before the wedding, I wasn’t feeling too great and was extremely tired, so I went to bed and we didn’t add the lettering to the chuppah or write our vows like we planned. Instead, we set the alarm for fairly early so we could get up and get everything done before my makeup appointment at 11. The best laid plans….
I woke up at 6 the morning of the wedding vomiting. I should mention at this point that I almost never throw up – I may get horribly nauseous on occasion, but nothing every actually comes up. I have no idea if I had some sort of fleeting stomach bug or if it was nerves, but what I do know is that it was horrendous. I was completely miserable and all I could think was, “I’m not supposed to feel like this on my wedding day!” I couldn’t even keep anything I took for the nausea down for long. I finally took some old Phenergan (by the way Mom, that stuff expired seven years ago) which, while not completely effective, did prevent me from vomiting on the way to get my makeup done.
I thought my mom was going to take me to the makeup appointment, but she went to the farm early to set up there, so John took me and my maid of honor, Marie, to Asheville and dropped us off. Thankfully, one of my other bridesmaids, Allison, met us there and was able to take us to the farm. Even better, she brought non-drowsy Dramamine for me, which did wonders for my stomach.
The makeup didn’t take very long, so we went to the farm afterward where we met my cousin, Ali, who did my hair. Oh, and if you couldn’t tell, my braid hair extensions didn’t get there in time. Luckily, Ali is great with hair and curled and pinned my hair to perfection. My awesome photographer, Paula Roberts, was supposed to come at 2:30 to start photos, so John and I were planning on writing our vows before then. While waiting for photos and John, I started getting a bit hungry finally. I had completely forgotten about the whole food thing, but thankfully Allison brought a cooler of snacks (and champagne!). So we sat down upstairs at my aunt’s house (in my bra – I’d forgotten to bring a button-up shirt so I wouldn’t mess up my hair) and ate baguettes with goat cheese and sundried tomatoes and waited…
My mom called at one point, asking when my aunt was supposed to pick up the cake and cupcakes we ordered. I realized that the baker hadn’t replied to my last email asking when they’d be ready to be picked up, so I called to find out. When I asked the girl who answered the phone, she said, “Maybe you should talk to the owner,” and my heart sank. It turns out, he thought the wedding was in October for some reason, though we had been emailing and I’m quite certain I know what month my wedding is in. He sounded horrified that he’d gotten the month wrong, but he couldn’t do anything at that point.
Luckily, my aunt, Randi, and my cousin, Ali, came to the rescue. They went to Sam’s and got a sheet cake with red, blue, and white flowers for us. It may not have been the Guinness chocolate cake with Bailey’s icing and mini cupcakes we wanted, but it arrived in time and was gone by the end of the night, so I guess it worked out okay.
Meanwhile, John was with the guys, setting up the chuppah. When we set it up the day before, John decided that he should make a lattice of duct tape on the top to prevent the satin from sagging and that perhaps it should be tied to the fence in addition to having the poles shoved in the ground. John also had to put the lettering on, but he didn’t think it would take that long.
Cut to half an hour before the photographer is supposed to come. I’m looking out the window at my aunt’s house, trying to figure out why the guys were still working on the chuppah, which still didn’t have the fabric on it. I finally called John who said that it was too windy and they needed to stake it down and were having issues. They finally got it up and stable, but they didn’t start changing until right before the photographer arrived.
Paula and my cousin Briana (also a wonderful photographer) started taking photos of my and the bridesmaids first, then we did the whole wedding party, and then she shot just the guys while I was back at the house drinking champagne. By the time the photos were done, people were arriving, and I didn’t see John again until right before the ceremony, so we didn’t have vows written. We decided to wing it.
The processional was the Throne Room and End Title from Star Wars IV. I walked down the aisle with my dad and my step-dad to Queen’s version of the Wedding March from Flash Gordon. Our officiant read the rather brief ceremony we had written, then my maid of AWESOME read the Jewish ceremony. Marie did a fabulous job with the seven blessings and we are so grateful she was willing to do that for us. I got a bit teary at points, but every time John saw me get that “squinty look” he started making silly faces at me so I wouldn’t cry. I did at one point giggle out loud though, which I felt bad about because it was while Marie was reading the seven blessings.
When we got to the vows, they went something like this:
“I promise to take you to every vineyard in North Carolina at least twice”
“I promise to always go see the glockenspiels with you”
“I promise to always buy the big back of Jack Link beef jerky to share”
“I promise to always split the last piece with you”
“I promise to always make you watch movies from my childhood with bad special effects”
“I promise to always watch those movies no matter how terrible the special effects are.”
We exchanged rings, broke a glass, and then John and I walked back up the aisle as husband and wife to the 2008 Doctor Who theme.
The reception started immediately afterward since we already had almost all of the photos we needed (and because the reception venue was about 20 yards away), and it was a blast! I changed out of my 5″ glittery Union Jack platform boots into my Converse high-tops to facilitate dancing.
I hope all of our guests had a good time; we certainly did. My only complaint is that people left far too early! That was really the only thing I truly regret about the day – not being able to spend more time with everyone.
The only really bad thing about the reception was that someone brought me a glass of wine and it stung me. Apparently somewhere between the booze table and where I was standing, a yellow jacket dived kamikaze-style into the wine, so when I took a sip it stung me on the lip. That was the only time I really cried at the wedding, because that hurt like hell. Luckily, Susan pulled out the stinger and my friend from high school, Dr. Jason Blatt (really), got a cigarette from someone and put the wet tobacco on my lip. The tobacco tasted disgusting, but it brought the swelling down almost immediately.
- Being violently ill the morning of the wedding
- Not getting the chuppah done until the last minute
- Not getting the hair extensions in time
- Not writing vows
- Our cake and cupcakes didn’t come through
- Getting stung by a yellow jacket on my lip
- All of our super amazing friends and family who chipped in in SO many ways to make it all come together
- All of John’s immediate family was able to come, and his mom and dad wore awesome hats
- My uber-prepared bridesmaid Allison bringing me medicine for my stomach and delicious snacks for later
- The chuppah getting done eventually and looking badass
- My cousin Ali giving me an awesome wedding updo
- Improvising our vows
- My aunt and cousin saving the day by going to get a cake for us
- My maid of honor reciting the blessings in Hebrew for us (with English translations)
- Getting John to dance with me (only once, but still)
- Getting my dad to dance with me (albeit briefly)
- My friend from high school who couldn’t make it being there via Face Time on another friend’s phone
- Seeing everyone, even though we didn’t get to spend as much time with them as we would have liked
- And the biggest wedding win of all: marrying my best friend
Despite all of the many things that went wrong, I couldn’t imagine a better day.
And now I shall leave you with a few more photos.
We’re married! I definitely won’t say everything went off without a hitch – there were quite a few almost-disasters along the way – but we’re finally husband and wife. I’ll try to do a more complete post on Wednesday after my paper has been turned in (yes, I had a paper to write over my wedding weekend; luckily it’s a fairly short one). I had such a great time at the wedding, but John and I have agreed that we’re never planning a wedding again
We were so grateful for all of our wonderful friends and family who came out to support us, especially all of the magical wedding fairies who prevented the aforementioned almost-disasters from becoming actual disasters. We love you all!
The next post will probably be quite lengthy, because I’m going to go into all of the bumps along the way. Hopefully we’ll have some more photos by then too! I’ve included a couple of the photos we’ve gotten so far in this post, so I’ll give credit where credit is due. The first one is from my cousin, Briana, who was shooting backup for our photographer, Paula. I’m not sure who shot the second photo, but it’s of my cousin, Brent, and his wife, Allyson, who are huge Whovians (who also brought some extra Doctor Who decor for the wedding, which was awesome). They’re standing under our Tardis chuppah, and yes we built it ourselves (which will be another post entirely). The third photo was taken by my friend from high school, Laura.
One final word about the wedding for today is that I am so glad we didn’t schedule the honeymoon for immediately after the wedding. We really scheduled it over fall break so that I wouldn’t miss as much school, but we are still recovering from the lack of sleep and stress of the week leading up the wedding. We were absolutely exhausted yesterday and all we wanted to do was get home and go to bed.
I haven’t had a chance to post much lately because I’ve been quite busy. The summer semester is almost over, so I’ve had research guides due and exams are on Thursday and Friday. Haus of Ariella also recently had it’s 100th sale!
Update #1 – the first of the wedding invitations have gone out! As you may have read earlier, we had some issues with the invitations, but Vistaprint is an AMAZING company and sent us new ones for free, even though the problem was entirely my fault. They sent them priority too, so we got the new ones in less than a week. We’re printing the envelopes instead of handwriting them because John and I both have atrocious handwriting. I think the font we settled on for them is nice though – it’s pretty and wedding-y, but still quite legible. Printing them is a bit of a pain, so I’m trying to do them in small batches instead of all at once. So far we’ve only sent out the invitations to the living Doctors (yes, we’re geeks), but I might work on the others later today and tomorrow in between studying (there’s really only so much federal income taxation one can take at a time, so I need to have breaks anyway).
By the way, if you’re reading this and want to come to our wedding, but didn’t get a save the date, it probably means we don’t have your address (not that we don’t love you), so please message, text, or call me and let me know where to send the invitation.
Update #2 – the wedding dress is progressing. I’ve actually attached the bodice to the skirt since taking this photo, but I’m not sure how I feel about it. I’ll probably make some adjustments to it after I figure out how to put the invisible zipper in it because I’m not really happy with the fit. It’s been fun making it though, so even if I don’t end up wearing it, it’s okay.
Update #3 – we got a washer and dryer finally! Someone in our apartment complex put up a flyer for them and we got them both for $200! It’s really nice not having to schlep up to the laundry room and pay $3 every time we need to wash something, but we’ve totally messed with the cats’ world. Their litter boxes and food bowls used to reside in that closet, so they’re not too happy about the new arrangement.
Update #4 – John got a new phone. He was up for an upgrade, so he got a Droid 3 (which was free, because the Droid 3s are apparently horrifically old and out of date now). He was jealous of my R2-D2 Droid, so he decided to one-up me and got a Tardis phone skin and cropped his background to fit with the skin. Now I’m the one with phone envy.
Update OH MY GOD WE GAVE THE CATS BATHS – we’ve had flea problems since Dave came to live with us. We recently broke down and spent the extra money on Frontline to try to combat them, but apparently we now have super fleas. The other night I got sick of it and decided to bathe them all. We were talking about throwing Dave in a bath in particular because he’s allergic to fleas and has horrible scabs all over. Honestly, it wasn’t really that bad. John couldn’t believe I did it by myself because when he gave Dave a bath, Dave tried to kill him. Lily was actually the worst one, but she just kept flipping herself over in the water, which actually made my job a little easier. Darcy made horrible noises, but didn’t really do anything. Jude is a Maine Coon, so he’s cool with water, though he seemed a little confused about the whole thing. Of course, we then had a bunch of pathetically wet cats wandering around the apartment for the rest of the night.
Of course Darcy had to immediately go back to his new favorite hangout – the electric blanket in the linen closet. Luckily, we now have a washer and dryer, so we threw it in the wash last night to get the wet cat smell off of it. We still have fleas, but John is planning on putting the cats in the bathroom and spraying down the apartment with some flea stuff this week.
This may not turn into a running theme, but I like posting my favorite finds from one of my favorite sites. Etsy is a great place to sell handmade and vintage items, but it also a great place to spend all of the money you make selling said items. Here are a few more items I would LOVE to buy if I had the money (and a few I may buy anyway).
I love this jacket! For one, the style is to die for. I’m a sucker for cropped jackets and I love the buttons on this one. Plus, it’s reversible so it’s like TWO JACKETS IN ONE! As I type the $71 seems even more reasonable, because it’s like paying $35.50 for two jackets.
Another WANT item. For those of you who don’t know me personally, I pretty much live in hoodies. Right now, I’m wearing an uber-cute little red dress from BonneChanceVintage with my ratty hoodie from Target. I’m pretty much always cold, so hoodie’s are perfect for me, and I really need an upgrade. When I get the money, I’m totally going to buy this one. It’s awesomely geeky, plus it says “Allons-y” on the sleeve, which is what we’re getting engraved on our wedding bands. John really wants one too. Is it tacky to put matching Doctor Who hoodies on your wedding registry?
Here’s another wonderfully geeky item I stumbled upon – a Star Trek uniform bag. She makes them in red too if you want to be the first one to die on a strange planet.
How do I love this dress? Let me count the ways. For one thing, I love all things cherry blossom, so a cherry blossom dress is amazing. I also love this style of dress – I’m all about tea length retro dresses right now. I’m also really feeling teal and pink right now, so the color combination is really just icing on top. If I had $235, this dress would be mine now. By the way, she makes these is a TON of other colors including white and ivory. Can I say wedding dress?
I’ll leave you with these amazing Star Wars Lightsaber cake servers. If we decide to do cake for the wedding, we might even contact this seller to see if she can make sonic screwdriver ones.
If you’ve read my first post then you know that I started this blog after I got kicked off of the Offbeat Bride Tribe for something inane. I loved the community and liked being able to talk about wedding planning with a group of mostly like-minded individuals, but the moderators at OBB are very heavy-handed and there’s a lot of censorship there (though they’ll never call it that). Of course, I’m still free to browse through the blog, but there’s a TON of sponsored posts (generally for things that I could never afford) so I tend to avoid it.
When I started this blog, I thought that it would be a kind of substitute for OBB. I really expected to mainly be blogging about wedding planning, since that was all I could think about at the time. Looking back, getting kicked off of OBB was actually a really good thing for me. For one, it’s allowed me to step back from wedding planning. When that’s all you’re surrounded by, even if it’s just in an online community, that’s pretty much all you think about. My life is so much more than a wedding though. I’m a full-time law student for one, which keeps me pretty busy even if it’s not the sort of thing non-law students really want to hear about. I’m a wanna-be musician. I craft all the time (and now have an Etsy shop). My fiance and I had little adventures in our free time. I’m far more than a date in September.
Not constantly surrounding myself with wedding stuff online has allowed me to realize something else – other people don’t really care about my wedding. It’s not that they don’t care that I’m getting married; they’re very happy for me. What they don’t care about is the minutiae that goes into weddings. No one who is actually going to be at our wedding is really all that concerned about our centerpieces, whether we fold 1000 paper cranes, or any of that stuff. They love us and want to celebrate our union with us. None of them are going to be silently judging us for our lack of mason jars.
Another revelation is that we don’t have to out-weird all of the other “offbeat” couples. Nor do we have to do something just because it’s considered offbeat (see: mason jars). Reading wedding blogs that feature a lot of real weddings can really mess with your thinking if you’re not careful. With OBB it was almost like a competition to see who could be the most offbeat. I wasn’t the only one who felt that way either; there were a number of posts on the tribe from brides who were worried that their wedding wasn’t going to be offbeat enough. OBB coined a term for the less out-there weddings: offbeat lite. To me, being labeled offbeat lite sounds like you’re not one of the pretty, popular girls, but you aren’t part of the edgy, rebel clique either. You’re like me – an awkward, kinda quirky girl who doesn’t really fit in anywhere. But you know what? I’m not in high school anymore (okay, middle school was actually much worse for me). I can be myself without fearing the disapproval of any clique of popular girls or cool girls. I’m marrying a wonderful man who loves me despite (or is it because of) all of my quirks and awkwardness. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone on my wedding day. We’re not having a wedding for the benefit of an online community, and we’re certainly not having one so that some blog can hopefully judge out wedding worthy enough to post.
I’m not saying that our wedding is suddenly going to be a traditional affair. We’re still a quirky, geeky couple and we want our wedding to reflect our personalities. We’re still going to have a ton of geeky references, we’re still going to have a TARDIS chuppah, and, of course, we’re still going to have our Dalek cake toppers. Not because some blog told us to, but because we love Doctor Who and that was actually something that brought us together in the first place (Doctor Who and keeping my former roommate up by singing Queen into the wee hours of the night).
I still read wedding blogs, but now I tend to prefer the ones that are just about real brides planning for their weddings. I want to read about other people going through the same things I am, not be told what my wedding should look like or what vendors I should hire because they’re the only option for a truly offbeat wedding. For some good, authentic wedding blogs that just follow their authors as they navigate the treacherous waters of the wedding world check out The Bitchy Bride, Frugally Wed, Rogue Bride, and Wedding Planning Isn’t for Sissies to name a few.
I didn’t get around to posting anything on Saturday, because I was busy rephotograhing my birdcage veils with record fascinators. I also made a new one, which I quite like. I think they turned out quite well considering I shot them myself as I modeled them.
John got off of work early on Saturday and we spent the evening watching Doctor Who and eating hot dogs and tater tots (healthy, I know). I had gotten a Groupon for a 3.5 hour self-guided canoe trip in Durham for $15, so we were planning on spending Sunday doing that. Hélas, they require a reservation a week in advance, so it looks like that will be next Sunday’s outing. Instead, we went to the NC Museum of Life and Science in Durham. John has been wanting to take me there since our first date, but it never really worked out until yesterday.
First of all, let me point of to those of you who have plans (or will make plans) to get married in the Triangle area sometime in the future that you can also rent the museum for weddings. It’s definitely at the top of our list of places we would have the wedding if we had the money and were getting married around here. I have no idea how much it costs, since you have to contact someone for a rate quote, but I’m pretty sure it would be worth it however much it is. You can actually get married in the butterfly house. Oh and they have dinosaurs too. You can’t really beat it. Unless you got married at the Doctor Who Experience in London perhaps.
For those of you who don’t know, John proposed to me (in French) with a beautiful, antique, silver and turquoise ring. He knew I’d like it, because I’d pointed it out at an antique store we went to few months earlier. Did I mention that my fiance has an amazing memory? It wasn’t expensive, but it was what he could afford at the time. He called it a “space saver” until we found a more wedding-y ring that was affordable.
After a lot of searching we found the perfect ring! It’s beautiful, exactly what I wanted, and affordable. We got it from Cavalier Creations on Etsy. It has a blue sapphire in the center with white sapphires on either side. They’re all lab-created stones, of course, but I don’t care. They look quite real enough for me and didn’t cost the $1,000+ that getting real stones of that size and clarity would have cost. It came today and I couldn’t be happier! The only problem is that the ring is slightly loose. I ordered it in a size 5.5, but I guess I should have gone down a quarter of a size. I’m not sure what I’m going to do about it now. I don’t think it’s going to fall off, but it’s quite loose.
I’m going to continue to wear the silver and turquoise ring, but on my middle finger. That’s the finger it fits on anyway – it would have cost over $100 to get it resized (I’ve been using a ring sizer to keep it on my ring finger).
We found our wedding bands on Etsy too, but we haven’t ordered them yet. We’re hoping to sell my mom’s old wedding set to pay for them. We’re getting them from Rob & Lean who make a lot of really cool titanium rings. We’re getting their titanium and blue box elder wood inlaid set, which John says is going to be like wearing a chunk of the TARDIS on our fingers. We’re going to have them engraved with “Allons-y!” Yes, we really are that geeky.
I put my awesome record fascinator with a birdcage veil on Etsy as a custom order. I’m not selling that particular one, but I’ll make one like it to someone’s specifications (whatever color veil they want/different types of flowers, etc.). I stopped by Carmine’s this afternoon and made John take some pictures of me in the veil that were halfway decent.
John thinks that we should go to Surplus Sid’s and get matching top hats for the wedding, and I should just add a veil to the top hat. I kind of like that idea too, honestly. And speaking of Surplus Sid’s, if you’re in the market for a homemade K-9 made from what appears to be part of a popcorn maker and the top of a litter box for $17, stop by Sid’s in Carrboro.
We also found a Dalek Sec hybrid mask. I have no idea how much that is, because it was up high and I already felt like I’d bothered the woman working there enough.
I’m on a bit of an upcycled vinyl kick recently, so I’m going to attempt to make a record purse sometime soon. I got the handles for it today, but I need John to fix my sewing machine so I can make a lining for it. I also have a design in mind for a TARDIS apron that I want to try once I start sewing again. I have a new DIY tutorial for my record desktop organizer that I’m going to post on Monday, so be on the lookout for that.
I was about to go yell at the cats for scratching on something, then I realized that sound was actually hail hitting the window! I guess they weren’t kidding about the tornado warning / severe thunderstorm watch. I guess this is a good stopping point for this somewhat disjointed post.
So many projects, so little time. It’s been another busy day for me. I went to Walmart, Michael’s, and the Habitat Restore to pick up some more supplies. Then I got down to the crafting.
I finished my Dalek cake toppers and listed them on Etsy. I think they’re pretty adorkable. I started painting another bride Dalek with a metallic white paint too, though it seems to be coming out more silver. I was thinking about getting some small wires and making a tiny paper flower bouquet for her instead of the single, large (compared to her) ribbon flower. If I stick with the ribbon flowers, perhaps I shouldn’t put the leaves on there though. What do you think?
For our wedding, we have larger Daleks, but we probably aren’t going to paint them. Of course, they’re 5″ tall and might not fit on the cake. We’ll see. Read the rest of this entry »