Kittehs!Posted: June 24, 2013
I am crushingly disappointed right now – I just found out that I didn’t get the job I interviewed for in Virginia. Meaning we’ll be moving in with my parents for a while, at least until after I take the bar and can start waiting tables. We’re very thankful that we have that option, but clearly it’s not ideal for anyone.
Thus, I am going to write about something happy – kittehs! Seriously, cats always make me feel better, even when they’re being horrible. I think the cuteness is a defensive mechanism, because that’s probably the only thing that keeps us from killing them when they shred the toilet paper, wake us up at 4am by screaming at the door, or knock over a glass of wine…onto the computer.
Our cats are currently helping us pack. Above, you can see Lily hard at work. In case you haven’t met them (and how many people have ever met Darcy?), here’s an introduction to our cats.
Jude (full name: Judas) is the elder of the group. He’s 16 years old and still quite active, though he does have a habit of standing in corners and yowling occasionally. We’re not entirely sure if it’s a sign of senility or if he just likes to annoy us. John has had him since he was a kitten and claims he doesn’t actually like anyone, he just likes stealing warmth. He clearly does like my lap, but he just as clearly loves John, so I don’t think that’s entirely true. If you’re looking for Jude, he prefers small, dark spaces like under the printer.
Next up: Lily (full name: Lily Potter, aka: Bitch). The photo above is black and white; she’s actually more brown than that. I remember my mom reading me a story about a misbehaving kitten when I was a kid. The last line was something along the lines of, “Babykins was such a good kitten…when he was fast asleep.” That’s Lily. I got her from a shelter in Brooklyn right after graduating from Columbia. She was super affectionate and somewhat older (about 9 months) than the kitten I originally went to the shelter to meet. She really is a sweet cat…as long as she’s getting her way. If she feels thwarted or thinks you aren’t paying attention to her. She’s toilet paper’s worst nightmare too. I’m convinced that her tiny little heart just can’t contain the rage she feels when we callously refuse to feed her at 3am, thus the toilet paper has to die.
Lily is the cat who brazenly jumps onto the kitchen counter while you’re serving dinner, then gives you the “what’s your problem” look when you yell at her. She also clearly doesn’t quite understand the concept of hiding since her favorite hiding spots when she wakes us up in the wee hours of the night include the bathroom sink, under a bar stool, and behind my closed laptop.
Dave (full name: David Lo Pan the Big Boss of Chinatown) is our fat boy. He’s about 4 years old, but he got neutered a bit late. After that he ballooned up to over 18 pounds! We put the cats on a diet (we can’t feed them separately, so they’re all on it), but Dave is holding steady even though the others lost weight. We aren’t sure if it’s his thyroid or just a complete lack of appetite control, but unfortunately we can’t really afford to take him to the vet to find out. He’s a super sweet cat, though he’s still a bit paranoid because John’s former roommate was, well, not the nicest person to cats. His favorite things in the world are cats toys. Seriously, he loves them all and tries his very best to destroy them. He’s particularly fond of jingly balls. They get really annoying for us, but that’s okay because they get him active and moving. He and Darcy are buddies, but Lily seems to think he’s a punching bag. For instance, I’ll throw her off of my desk and she’ll run over and swat Dave. I feel bad about it, but he seems to just keep going. He’s a really great lap cat, too. If I ever want a cat up on my lap while we’re watching something, I just have to call him.
Last, but certainly not least, is Darcy (full name: Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, aka: Weenie). I got Darcy as a teeny, tiny little kitten when I lived in Korea. Clearly, he’s not so teeny tiny anymore. He was supposed to be a foster cat, but I’m obviously not cut out to simply foster cats, so he came home with us. Darcy is a big, powerfully built cat. He actually weighs as much as Dave does, he’s just not nearly as round. He’s capable of making incredibly frightening wild-animal noises, however he’s also an incredible weenie. Really, the cat is afraid of nearly everything. If a stranger comes in the house (and he still has questions about John), he will run and hide in the bathroom cabinets. He’s a sweetie when he’s not freaking out though. John swears I’m the only living person he likes, but he loves to cuddle up under a blanket with me. He also tries to burrow in my robe a lot.
Darcy loves Lily and is best buddies with Dave, but his arch-nemesis is Jude. Darcy is generally the cat who doesn’t cause problems, unless, of course, someone (ahem, Jude) is looking at him. He’s also definitely the cat you are least likely to see if you ever visit the Carver house (or downstairs at the Goolsby house in the near future). Darcy (if no strangers are around) is usually under the bathroom cabinet, on a shelf in the bathroom closet, or basking in the window on his spiffy Union Jack cat mat.